again: if you watch the new harry potter, I will think less of you. Not telling you that you can't, just telling you that I will think less of you.

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Parenting pro-tip: Don't give your child a middle name. That way they can't grow up to be an assassin or serial killer.

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Shout-out to hotel guest before me that leave themselves logged into the tv apps.

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This whole presidency is a generational national trauma and I can assure you we are fucking aware of it

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I wonder why anyone would think that war with Iran, rising inflation, the destruction of the White House and other landmarks, a trade war with Canada, and endless corruption and scandal would cause generational trauma. A mystery!

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