someone want to buy one for me? I promise I'll put it through rigorous tests. I have a PhD in gravitational physics.

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Speaking of Kenzie? Seriously. Goaltending is NOT AN ISSUE. Shut up about it already. The slow firsts are a problem. They're not an insurmountable problem, they started slow last year too, but it's a problem.

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broke a man the first time i told him this. He came up to me and said "I just don't like tattoos" and I said "well, I'm not trying to have sex with You" and I saw something permanently rotate inside him

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Don't get me wrong: it's very bad that a centuries old town hall caught fire, but a society that thinks this is worth getting preoccupied about and doesn't seem to much care about people losing hands and eyes and life is a society that needs a serious rethink of priorities

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Household portrait. (Look, Poseycat is not only in the same room as Spatula, she's also NEAR Spatula without cussing!) (Spatula is now licking my knee, WHY?!?!)

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