yesterday my dad said “there’s been this huge show, heated rivalry? have you watched it?” and i did the greatest impression of a normal person that has ever been put to stage or screen

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my first-thought review of you can see everything was "you can see everything, and by everything, we mean, nathan fielder's beard acne"; said this to m and she told me that, one, she hadn't noticed at all and that, two, this was, on my part, "such a fucking trans guy take"

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Blood sugar is 50 and dropping, but I need to read and understand a 15,000 word agreement and send an opt out email before I know this. Luckily I’m in the perfect state of mind to be doing this and have nothing urgent that needs to be addressed

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i think abt this post every time im baking and fuck up with the kitchen scale your babies are like muffins in a way

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the twins were in the NICU because the scale said they only weighed 4 lbs each at birth. A day later they weighed 6 lbs. We were like "so did someone just forget to tare the scale yesterday" and it was a masterclass in watching every medical professional Not Admit Anything and Change The Subject

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