I spoke with Mitch McConnell for about 20 minutes tonight and then he was like "Oh, wait Lindsey Graham just showed up, wanna talk to him?"

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Somewhere up in heaven, Richard Scarry is like “fuck yeah, told you so”: www.bbc.com/news/world-u...

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Stop what you're doing and look 🌍 The full globe? That is the NIGHT SIDE. I'm pretty sure I can see some satellites/debris glinting away on the periphery. Also the Aurora?! What a bonkers beautiful world that supports and holds everyone and everything you've ever known and loved, and so much more.

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Like most of us I'm something of a generalist pervert, and so I consider it an exceptional pleasure to meet a genuine, dyed-in-the-wool, one-track-sexuality fetishist. Something with a single, load-bearing kink that their entire mind and identity revolve around to the exclusion of almost all else

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Me: I’d like to see the doctor; I hurt my knee. Scheduler: Ok. How did you injure it? Me: I have no idea. Scheduler (skeptical): You don’t remember a particular incident? Me, outwardly calm: No, but it started very suddenly. Me, inwardly: Bestie, I just told you my birthdate was in the 1900s—

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