A way I think about trauma recovery is that it's the collection of tools & philosophies that realistically supports us in becoming who we were meant to be-- not who we were told to be. Of course we weren't handed those by the people telling us who we "should" be. Why would they?

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The tools & philosophies we need to create a life we don't hate living are learnable. That might sound obvious, but it's my experience survivors sometimes need to be reminded. We're not learning a lost language here. People have figured this out, & written about it.

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What Master Yoda meant when he said "try not; do or do not, there is no try," is that the trying IS the doing. Trying is an act of courage. Trying is an act of defiance against our bullies & abusers. Nothing happens without trying-- which is why Trauma Brain wants us NOT to try.

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Yes: you may right now have an identity that was shaped by your trauma. Not your fault & not your choice. A core goal of recovery is to create an identity you DO choose. Remember that it's consistency in self talk, mental focus, & behavior that will create your NEW identity.

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Every trauma survivor working their recovery is in the process of swapping out survival reflexes for strategic choices. Life up until now was lived in reaction to things we didn't choose. Life from here on out is lived in alignment w/ values & goals we DO choose.

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