I'm going to bury her in my garden later today. She had such a huge personality and I'm not exactly sure how to go on with this. I will miss her. I will miss her so much.

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I've had her way before I moved into my apartment, she was around 16 years old and she was still chirping happily yesterday. I feel so sad and like I'm despairing She was going to have a huge self-built cage once I moved. I'm so sad she never got to see it She is also the reasons I made BirdHaven

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So. After getting up and realizing something was wrong, its with my heavy heart to say that Mari, this morning, was laying still on the bottom of her cage. I cannot even fathom how she passed, what happened to her or what caused this umprompted death, but I am devistated.

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That’s it for now, my acid-reflux-addled manic 3am horny/depression post is over with. I feel satisfied that I managed to scream *something* into the void that represents my feelings even if they don’t make much sense. Time to get some sleep maybe

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I want to touch. I want to BE touched. I wanna be selfish and I wanna take and demand and be taken from in turn, and i wanna learn to give as good as I take. I watched something over the weekend and idk, a switch flipped. I realized that I wanted more. But I’m still too afraid to go for it.

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