Those of us below the line know that you ... and not Key ... are the real content.

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I went to see my old mate Tim Key's show tonight. Several people came up and said 'this must be annoying, but can we have a selfie'. I was all gracious: 'haha, it's fine!' Actually it's more than fine. I NEED IT. PLEASE RECOGNISE ME.

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When people say, "Don't police your feelings", I assume it's because that sort of thing isn't really in the police's jurisdiction. But which enforcement body handles these matters? Should moods be reported to the noise complaints hotline, for instance?

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"Thursday, I don't care about you / It's Friday, I'm in love" - what happened between Thursday and Friday to cause such a quick change of heart?

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Yeah exactly the same here, it's not a knack for timing the cooking, it's a knack for timing the timer

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