Perhaps, sir, if we bomb a couple girls schools in Oslo, they'll get the fucking message about how goddamn deserving of a peace prize you truly are.

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NYC is opening 160 car-free (but treat-filled) streets and plazas to enjoy fun and safe fall festivities this spooky season. Find one near you at nyc.gov/trickorstreets.

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I apologize for using taxpayer funds to start Whatnot News Network. WNN will be sponsored by Kangol going forward. I appreciate privacy during this difficult time.

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The only thing better than the Supreme Court's ruling in favor of mail-in ballots is the #CryBaby-In-Chief's predictable, but oh-so tiresome meltdown when he loses. #Waaahhh 😭 😩

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Fridge died in 🇨🇦 so off to the appliance store. Salesguy “yes, these are both the same brand. The one on your right is made in China and the one on the left is from the U.S.” I gave him the look and then we laughed and laughed as we loaded the Chinese one up.

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