crocodile tears is such a funny phrase. some guy looked at a crocodile and thought “he looks so sad. but i mustn’t believe him”

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Fucked that there are a million songs about love but only one about baking me a cake as fast as you can

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Bringing one of the best tweets of all time over to Bluesky in honour of the Three Lions QF victory

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MAYOR MAMDANI HELP

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Horrible new bullshit from the sea every time. It’s never ‘oh we found a new pink fish that is so happy’ it’s always stuff like this, the crush-depth screw-headed dongwongler, and it’s got to have big long creepy bits. Sick of the ocean tbh.

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