One million or dinner with Jay Z is so easy. I pick the spot. Get him to shake on paying. We go to whats clearly a garage with white sheets everywhere to make it look fancy. Lawn chairs. My smart friend is the matter d, my dumb friend is the chef. Jay asks for a water. The price? 2 million dollars.

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I never get scared when homeless people scream at me. I actually love it because I'm a good person

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starving children in India are sooo smug because they know they've got it the worst. they're like "na na na na boo boo nobody can say our pain is invalid because we're at the bottom of every social hierarchy! we won!"

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all of our lives suck but we can't feel special about it because there are people out there with lives that suck more

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CNC littles be like Things I hate: - choosing - being told "it's up to you" - having a choice - being made to choose - picking things - being told to choose - choosing when I don't know - CHOOSING

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