Sid James, who died 50 years ago today. What a legacy he left behind.

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Yes I've tracked down and bought a copy of the magazine Barbara Windsor reads in Carry On Again Doctor, what of it? How dare you insinuate I've got nothing better to do with my time. The cheek of it.

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Barbara Cartland: Dig for Victory to ease vegetable shortages.

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Bloke sitting in the petrol station forecourt in his massive pick-up with the engine running as he looks at his phone. Sadly I left before he got out to let us check out his shin tattoos.

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Whenever a mega cruise ship docks in Funchal, I like to look it up and sneer at the hellscape it offers. Today it's Mein Schiff Relax, with 19 decks and nearly 4,000 passengers. One of its bars is called the "Street Art Bar" and its "feel-good ambassador" is Robbie Williams.

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