If you think this car drove up this ramp at that speed I have a bridge to sell you

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Checking in at the hotel in Texas the front desk guy asks “Minnesota, that’s not cheese, what do you have?” “Revolution”

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Hi. This is my pumpkin (drawing) there are others like it but this one is mine.

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“Do you think that person is a man or a woman?” my aunt asked me, referring to a groundskeeper mowing the lawn of the Walker Sculpture Garden while we walked through At first I said nothing, and then I kept saying nothing “I guess it doesn’t matter,” she concluded Sometimes silence is best

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the reason these people need to be stripped of almost all of their money is so that they stop thinking that it gives them the right to nominate themselves for the "benevolent dictator" position

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