god in heaven MAKE A NEW THING. anything! i don’t even care if it’s bad as long as it’s new!

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Watching an episode of chopped where the contestants are all teenagers and one girl was detailing her story about how she had to cook for the whole family after her mom died and the judge looked up from his plate and said “this swordfish is dry”

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holy smokes, conan strikes up a chat with a random lady on the subway and she immediately starts riffing on his level, no problem.

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This woman should immediately replace Mr. Subway Takes as the host of Subway Takes. Came into the game and started throwing darts, you can’t go back to the starter now

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"Insiders tell me Man City are set to face huge points deduction which will guarantee relegation - but they won't be sent down to League Two. And that seems fair, writes OLIVER HOLT" The only 'insiders' who know aren't able to speak and that absolutely would not be a fair punishment.

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