"Or else I break up the family" or "Or else I move on from you now that I've gotten everything I need to be stable in my life and you're in a more vulnerable position than I am".

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tbc, I'm saying men in long established relationships. I don't really care if a single guy is poly, it's the dudes who have a marriage and/or kids leveraging those buy ins effectively in the relationship.

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I'm sure somewhere in north america is a man who has had deep and profound changes in sexuality and POV who has an epiphany but is still straight, but in my experience it's the exact same type of guys who used to just cheat prior taking advantage of women who already invested tons of time in them.

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My most middle aged old man take but on some level it seems obvious every guy coming out as 'poly' in middle age is basically just a dude who is sort of openly saying "or I'm just going to cheat" and they've lucked into a point in American history where that angle doesn't instantly vilify you.

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lol Adam Conover come on man

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