It is with a heavy heart that I must admit my new book "fucking sucks" and is "absolute dog shit." This is a big change from a couple of days ago when it was "a work of genius."

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Famously, wine is only produced in the USA /s

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This is as good a moment as any to say that I don't think I've ever loved an American wine. It's just so welcoming and inoffensive. I'm sure the Canadians will survive well enough without it.

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Of course it is, but you’re making my point. The average person, especially a busy person, isn’t going to be persuaded by your version of Post-modernism. I don’t know how old you are, but speaking as someone who had to read Derrida in a college film class, there some validity to my caricature.

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With the greatest possible respect: Fuck off, yankee

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