My kinky ex-girlfriend used to have sex with fruit whenever she got stressed... After we broke up, she went fucking bananas! 🤣

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I have a dream. Jurgen Klopp returns, Edwards fucks off, Mo stays, Harvey stays, Robbo says why the fuck not even if I don’t play. Stevie volunteers to be assistant. Ian Graham begs to return. Believe in the power of believing.

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Bob Mortimer as the new James Bond, please

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Get him the fuck out of my club.

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Some news. My freelance life is over. I'm going to be a Data Visuals Journalist in sport for The Guardian. Starting next month. From a hobby to a job to a national newspaper. It's been a journey. And it's only just starting.

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