Just so I have this straight: USA Today, you published an entire article about a guy liking social media posts regarding his wedding?

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EDITORS IN THE FUTURE (holding manuscript): You'll need to prove you and not "AI" have written this ME: I peed on it to establish it's my territory EDITORS: No good, there's no DNA in urine ME: I took an extra step after that EDITORS: Does it involve DNA? ME: Half of it anyway

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never noticed this until now for some reason, but the symbol for the cancer zodiac sign looks like a 69. nice

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If I could have a magic box that would let my cats understand me for only one sentence, that sentence would be, "For fuck's sake, throw up on the bare floor and not on the goddamn carpet"

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Binface should hype up the fact that he's going to take off his bin helmet, but when he does so, it just reveals a slightly smaller bin beneath it.

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