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• fesshole 🧻@fesshole.bsky.social16/10/2025 06:40

  Caught my colleague siphoning projects with big bonuses attached off me without telling me. So for the last year have been deleting, moving, renaming and swapping documents in his files, letting him think he's going senile and letting him take the flak from the bosses.

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• fesshole 🧻@fesshole.bsky.social16/10/2025 06:39

  45 year old married bloke. I love my wife dearly, but have struggled with my weight for years. Realised that I'm only ever able to motivate myself to lose weight when I'm trying to shag someone new. Planning an imaginary affair just to motivate myself. Hoping I won't act on it.

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• fesshole 🧻@fesshole.bsky.social16/10/2025 06:39

  Had to have a catheter inserted for an operation and had the best night's sleep in ages with no getting up to pee. I kind of miss it.

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• fesshole 🧻@fesshole.bsky.social16/10/2025 06:38

  Sustained a hernia during a particularly strenuous bout of horizontal gymnastics. Claimed the injury had occurred during a subsequent car crash and got £7k compensation for one of the best experiences of my life.

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• fesshole 🧻@fesshole.bsky.social16/10/2025 06:38

  I was not included in my sister in laws wedding photos as I was busy breastfeeding our first born. They didn't wait for me. Why she thought I wanted to view them after the event I have no idea. Very expensive wedding and they got acrimoniously divorced. Serves them right.

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