bought bf a cookbook, he opened it, pointed at "lady cream pea" and looked at me with a grin

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You can make the attempt, but you do not need to break bread with everyone who crosses those boundaries. This perspective regularly transforms any blame or hatred I feel into an all-encompassing pity that things could have been better under different circumstances. It's a lot less stressful.

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This doesn't map very well to a functional society, or in the spaces we make for ourselves. People can be horrible creatures. The boundaries we set, and that society sets for everyone, are incredibly important. You need to do what's good for yourself and those you choose to care for.

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One thing that helped me get over hangups and paranoia from years of schoolyard bullying were ideas pulled from hard determinism. Ultimately, we are beings without any true agency. Everyone is a result of everyone else, and therefore blameless. You, too, are blameless. Love yourself.

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This bum ass fuckin country

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