they gotta do away with the kickoff entirely. boring injury-ritual fake ass football

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www.pro-football-reference.com/teams/kan/20...

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and there's jon, first-year coach of the saints. he's lobbying the refs, let's see if we can lip-read what he's saying ... it ... it looks like "they practiced that." it seems he's accusing his opponent of practicing their plays beforehand. team practice is allowed by rule, but oh boy. he is furious

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if you wear a casio watch, the only way to set an alarm is to give it to a two-year-old and let them play with it. the only way to turn the alarm off is to bump your wrist on something eight weeks later. there is no other way to turn the alarm on or off

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operator: 911, please state the nature of your emergency me: hey. why was liberty biberty beheaded operator: he constructed the forbidden fractal me: i don't know what that means operator: some 300 light-years from earth, there exists what you might describe as a "palace of time." the me: nevermind

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