A little disappointed here learning that my new bat wings do not allow me to fly. It’s difficult to fully get into character but I’m a professional, so bat I am. 🦇🎃🐾 Happy Halloween!

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No disrespect to Stover (I enjoyed the book!) but I also suspect you could comfortably fit every Gen Z man who’s read it inside a high school gym. These people are just losers trying to identify with guys (the Empire, the Sith, the Nazis, the Confederacy) who also got their asses kicked.

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Nerds clusters are insanely perfect candy

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Tonight I learned that Nerds Clusters and 100 Grands are like gold on the Halloween open market. I wasn’t sure anyone would go for the 💯s but kids love ‘em!

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I'm not "gaining" an hour. You stole an hour from me and now you're returning it

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