why would i speak to humans when i can simply befriend a crow

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You mean like a barista who knows a regular? Or like a bartender that knows a regular? One of the small joys of working in hospitality is interacting with your regulars and the same goes for customers interacting with their favorite barista/bartender. This is so fucking dumb.

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who the fuck wants this from a coffee shop

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If you want more Patrick Stewarts, then you publicly fund the arts and learning programs, so that working class kids can find their way into making a career in them.

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do not funnel your grief over this death into trek and x-men merch, paramount & disney dont need your money. go to plays, give to charities, vote for candidates who will fund public art, and you will make it possible for people like patrick stewart to exist and keep existing. a rising tide lifts all

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