my wife found my high school yearbook and is currently reading what everyone wrote in it, and so far almost every single one is like, “you are the weirdest person I have ever met in my whole life” ☠️

Show Post

ICE agents apparently searched for themselves in the leaked database, thereby revealing their identities

Show Post

There are three digits, clocks in this kitchen and I’m not changing them all, the toaster oven doesnt need to know what time it is

Show Post

Yes, I remember when I was carrying 15 plates full of food to table 32 on Sunday breakfast service thinking to myself, yeah this is a lot like wrting code.

Show Post

fuck it i’ll just be late to everything

Show Post